Feel

It was a sucker punch if there ever was one.
Outside my body I saw the whole thing in slow motion.
I turned around and the fist was in my face.
Defenseless.
There was no stopping it.
And in that moment, every memory of pain surfaced.
I stumbled, and then I hit the ground.
Crumpled.
I wasn’t getting up this time. There was no way.
This was too much.
I couldn’t survive this.
Done.
Every bruise I’ve ever had returned to my body.
All my pain was brand new all over again.
I couldn’t move.
Paralyzed.

I was moving again.
I couldn’t… I wouldn’t be defeated.
Every amount of will surfaced from within.
Standing.
Weak but not defeated.
I took out the weight I’d been holding onto.
I didn’t have to hold onto it anymore.
Heavy.
I held it in my hands.
I took a deep breath.
I threw it to the ground.
Shattered.
Freedom was born from pain.
Just because you’re weak doesn’t mean you can’t be brave.
Feel and let go.
Feel
and
let go.